Friday, October 21, 2005

Boob Tube

The Hammer has news for you, Mrs. Hitlery Clintoon! While you may think it's pretty hi-damn-larious to leave some Soap-On-A-Rope and a big ol' tub of Vaseline on my doorstep, and go hide in the hydrangeas (though from what I hear, you sure don't mind squattin' down with your face buried in some bush!), The Hammer don't go down like that.

I don't know how they play it on your side of the aisle, but if this Majority Leader enjoys some long-term federally-funded hospitality, he's gonna be the one packing the feeding tube all the other prags are sucking off!

Thursday, October 20, 2005

De-Bunked!

By the way, tough titties, Turd Blossom! Fristy's already called dibs on us being bunkmates, so's if you're gonna be joining us down at the ol' Graybar Hotel, might I suggest you (A.) get on the horn with your pal Scooter, and (B.) holler shotgun for the top bunk. From what I hear, Scoots is a "leaker" in more ways than one!

Smell ya!

Please Hammer - don't hurt 'em!

Smiling DeLay turns himself in for booking

'Course I flashed 'em my pearly-ass whites. Arrested or not, ain't no one gonna make a tool out of The Hammer!